by Thomas Hare
Statements Against Heterosexual Marriages Only
Statement
In this video Tom describes how he grew up attending Eastern Avenue CRC, was a student at Oakdale Christian School and that his father taught at Calvin University. He also describes wrestling with his sexuality and the difficulties he experienced from friends as he was growing up. It was a very difficult experience. Anyone who actively considers suicide is very clearly dealing with a very difficult matter.
He says that 10 years ago he was choosing between taking testosterone treatments or killing himself. He chose the treatments. He transitioned from female to male. Today he has his Masters degree, has a loving partner and lives in Northern California.
His conclusion is that the committee thinks they are protecting the children but that he knows from his own experience that the committee is wrong. Had he followed the report 10 years ago he very likely would have committed suicide.
Response
As far as this life is concerned, it is good he chose life. We also need to take a step back on and considered the question of whether or not our human understanding is capable of grasping this entire topic from beginning to end. It is good that one person’s experience at this point in time turned out positive. Is that a guarantee, though, that if everybody in his situation followed that course that they, too, would experience the best possible outcome? The other videos in this series refer to the fact that depression and suicide are higher in LGBTQ+ communities than in the general population. Can we say with certainty that this is because people mistreat members of those communities or is this caused in a significant way by something that is inherent to the LGBTQ+ lifestyle?
We need to listen to and be supportive of all people. What is the best way we can help people who deal with same-sex attraction? Is our human wisdom sufficiently developed to the point that we can be confident we know what is best in these matters? Or are matters of human sexuality by nature matters of moral behavior? If they are matters of moral behavior, wouldn’t our best guide to follow be the Book on oral behavior given to us by God Himself?
The context of this current discussion of the Human Sexuality Report is that of the need for a decision to be made in the Christian Reformed Church concerning the nature of human sexuality. Churches are guided and directed by the Bible. Therefore, the need in front of us at this point in time is to determine what the Bible says about these matters of sexuality. Personal experiences can provide insights into the topic, but ultimately the question to be determined is what does the Bible say. Can experiences like Tom’s help us to better understand the Bible? Can they help us to see the Bible in a new light, in a way that we did not correctly understand previously? If so, we must do everything possible to gain from those insights. At the same time, we must also give careful consideration to the possibility that the loving guidance which our Heavenly Father has provided for us in His Holy Word might prohibit us from taking certain courses of action. If His Word does provide that direction, by ignoring it we will only do harm to ourselves and to others.